She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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