I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
