i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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