didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
she was so not down for the gang bang
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I haven't been this sober since birth.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
