I want to stick my p in your. b.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
