Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
