you guys were way drunker than both of me
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
