I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
