Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
what day is it and did you see me today?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
