So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
