Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
