K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
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