ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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