So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
