Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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