Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
