The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize