jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
