so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
