Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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