Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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