I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
