We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
