I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
