Farmville is her only friend.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
