I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize