I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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