When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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