I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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