Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
