Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
