Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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