i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
