Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
