Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
