i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm like, not good at living.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
