Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
