When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
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