I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
