woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
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