I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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