She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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