I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
