god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize