My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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