just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
