We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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