dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize