Duck Duck Cougar?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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