Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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