We're facebook friends in real life
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
