how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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