I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i was born a porn star she said
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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